Ok, so I have to confess, my favorite thing right now is watching old episodes of DesignStar on HGTV. I watched the first season years ago (eight, I think) and then lost track and caught another season two years ago. It’s clean television and I’m intrigued with how they come up with and implement their design ideas.
But one thing I’ve noticed is that every season has at least one (if not more) that is over-confident, and let’s just say, a bit “cocky.” Before any challenge is given, they are the ones tooting their own horn claiming to be the next DesignStar… “You just watch… I’m going to win.”
And every time, they are one of the first to be sent home.
So this brings me to something I want to point out: Don’t mistake the quiet and timid as the only ones who are insecure.
We tend to think that the shy or quiet person is the one who lacks self-confidence and is always uneasy or anxious around others. But this just isn’t a pat answer, or a correct label. In fact, it is often the loudest, most obnoxious, and self-absorbed person who is also the most insecure.
Speaking of the Pharisees, Jesus said, “But all their works they do to be seen by men” (Matthew 23:5). Our automatic assumption is PRIDE –that ugly 5-letter word Christians are supposed to avoid. And I agree 100%. But I’ve seen this time and time again… When someone is loud and over-stated, it is often an overcompensation to hide their true problem:
They are scared of what you think about them.
In the Book of John, we read: “Nevertheless even among the rulers many believed in Him, but because of the Pharisees they did not confess Him, lest they should be put out of the synagogue; for they loved the praise of men more than the praise of God” (John 12:42-43).
The first picture that comes to mind is men who cowered around the Pharisees and in fear of rejection, did not confess Jesus.
But let me paint a slightly different picture: Suppose their were men there, who for fear of the Pharisees, were loud –not quiet. Who boasted that they didn’t need “that Jesus” and joined in the commotion of the Pharisees. Why? So they could hide behind their fear of rejection.
Insecurity is found just as much in pride, as it is in timidity. [click to tweet]
Knowing this, I have really tried to evaluate my life, my ministry and writing, and my motives. For example, when I write a blog post, do I care more about ministering to people? Or simply seeing how many “likes” and “shares” I get?
Am I looking for affirmation from men? Or God?
The same is true when I guest-post somewhere. Do I share these with my readers or Twitter followers so they can see my successes? Or so they might be helped by what was written or taught?
And these issues don’t just occur in the public eye. As a wife, do you cook or clean or create, so your family will give you praise? Or so you can bless them and provide a comfortable and peaceful home?
As a business man, do you buy the latest and greatest gadget or watch or car so others can praise your achievements? Or because you’re grateful God has allowed you to enjoy these blessings?
I guess the best way to truly answer these questions, is to ask ourselves: Would I give it up if God asked me to?
I’ll leave you with that. These are just some things I’ve noticed and am making sure I keep tabs on in my own life.
Question: How about you? [answer in the comments]